


Fine

by orphan_account



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Benson & Munch Friendship, Episode Tag, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-27
Updated: 2013-08-27
Packaged: 2017-12-24 19:40:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 751
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/943887
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I've always loved that moment in "911" when Munch asks Benson about her date-that-didn't-happen.  The flatness of the exchange underscores just how bleak both their jobs and their personal lives must be.  But, just as they managed to save Maria, maybe they can save something else, too.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fine

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place right after "911" (season seven) but has vague spoilers about Benson's personal life; things that were probably going on at the time but didn't get referenced on the show itself until season twelve.

Benson tries hard not to complain about it too much.  ( _Bitch, bitch, bitch_ , she can hear her mother saying, using the word as a verb for "complain."  Benson knows better.  Just because slippery slope is a logical fallacy doesn't mean it isn't really true; what starts as misogynistic language can slide toward straight-up misogyny in no time flat.)  She's mentioned it, to the various shrinks mostly, when they do their evals, because it would be a flag if she didn't.  She's single, hasn't had a lot of serious relationships, has her own "special past" and all that jazz.  That she's willing to shine a light on that particular darkness is probably a large part of why she keeps getting her ticket punched "psychologically fit for SVU" when it's usually a revolving door of anywhere from six months to a year in, nine months out, then back in again.

She'd ask Huang about it, but she knows him too well.  He wouldn't be offended, he'd get that she'd be joking, but he might also get defensive, because while he's a big part of what keeps the band together, he's got to have some serious doubts about Stabler. 

But nobody outside SVU really understands, and even SVU people don't, like Cassidy who couldn't hack either her or SVU.  She'd like to think one wasn't related to the other, but it's impossible to disentangle her from her job, or Cassidy from the sweet but kind of dim guy whose revulsion over the crimes they were trying to investigate could, by a traumatized victim, be so easily misread as revulsion for the victim herself or himself, with increased male victim reporting (that in itself thanks to SVU's efforts, Benson likes to tell herself).  

Doesn't explain to her satisfaction why Cassidy sometimes comes around and she sometimes even lets him in.

And Jeffries…that would be Olivia Benson but for the grace of the faith Siena College restored to her.

She wouldn't have thought it, but Munch is a rock.  Not that he believed her about Maria any more or less than anyone else, but he'd sat with her, looking after one disgusting picture after another, trying to find some way to authenticate Maria's calls enough to justify keeping the investigation alive.  Benson remembered a few words they'd exchanged at one point; Munch asking and Benson affirming that she'd had a date, even tickets to _Spamalot._

"I hear it's funny," Munch had said, his voice as grim as both their expressions.  From the outside looking in, it might've even been funny.  Before Benson had a chance to crack a dark joke about that, Fin had shown up and Munch had, by Munch's standards, welcomed him with open arms.  "Come and pollute your soul with some child porn, my friend."  

For once, everyone went home happy.  Not only was Maria a real girl with real problems, they'd found her, still alive, no brain damage, although plenty of the other kind.  There wasn't any real celebration, though; they were all too tired and it seemed like a jinx to get to hyped up over the one success story haunted by so many failures.

The next day, or maybe the one after; it was all kind of a blur of hypnagogic fantasy and no true sleep, Munch had asked Benson if she still had her "date dress, you know, the little black number" in her locker.  It was such an odd question coming from Munch (hell, _anyone_ ) that it brought her up short.  She looked at Munch, who looked even more dapper than usual.

"Yeah," she said.  "Haven't had a chance to decide if it goes to the dry cleaner's or home."

Munch pulled a pair of tickets out of his inside breast pocket.  "How about the Shubert?" he asked.

Benson kept a straight face.  " _Spamalot_ ," she said flatly.  "I hear it's funny," she added, her inflection still completely deadpan.

Munch shrugged.  "A little hilarity won't pollute your soul," he said.  

Benson thought about that more than she really should've needed to.  "No," she said.  "It won't."

"I'm okay with it if your dress comes down more on the dry cleaner's side," Munch offered.  

Olivia Benson stopped off at her locker while Munch waited at his desk.  Her dress was fine.  She was fine.  The show was fine.  For a few hours of musical theater and a late pancake dinner at Munch's favorite diner, everything was fine.

Some days, some nights, fine was better than she could hope for.


End file.
